BEWARE THE LOLLIPOP OF MEDIOCRITY

LICK ONCE AND YOU SUCK FOREVER

I heard this a few years ago from my friend Patrick Houghton. Pat could not stop laughing as he told me about seeing this on a t-shirt somewhere in his business travels. We both laughed about it, then, as the laughs slowed, the realization of the truth behind the humorous saying hit me. Mediocrity is a miserable existence and—like a haircut or bad habit—can become our personal status quo—something we do just because it is the way we have always done it.

Sometimes it is just too easy—too comfortable—doing the wrong thing. I say “wrong thing” because most of us have an innate desire for excellence—or at least we desire to be better. Most of us want to be the best we can be: the best father or mother, the best coach or teacher, the best lawyer or doctor or carpenter. However, somewhere along the way we are presented with the free lollipop of mediocrity. It appears bright, shiny, sweet-smelling and attractive. It comes to us at a time of crisis or need. It calls to us, “Come on, just one lick won’t hurt.” But, the t-shirt is right: lick it once and you suck forever. Fred Selfe believed it did not have to be forever—IF you are willing to break the chain of actions that got you into the mediocre behavior. That means you have to change in a big way. And the best way to do this is in small steps.

Microwave Mentality
Change is rarely easy. Change is downright difficult. Change takes courage and strength. A business mentor once told me, “Change is like making an omelet; you can’t make a good one without chopping up things and breaking some eggs.”

The Key to Lasting Change is make it a step-by-step process. Then, take one step at a time. Make your personal revolution an incremental revolution. As a professional manager I deal with behavioral change. When I first come to an organization I take long look at all the processes and procedures. I analyze them and make copious notes about them. Then I interview the managers of the process and ask, “Why do you do it this way?” The most common answer is, “No idea, it’s just the way it’s always been done.”

Nine Inch Ham
A newlywed couple sat down to their first meal together. The wife was extremely proud of the ham she’d made from her grandmother’s family recipe. The man took a look and noticed something odd about the ham—she had cut 3 inches off the ends and made it into a square. “Honey, why did you cut so much off the ham and make it into a square?”

She replied, “Well, that’s the way my grandmother has done it since I was a child and it’s the bet ham I’ve ever had.” So they ate and the ham was delicious. Thanksgiving rolls around and they are her family’s home. The grandmother is there, so the husband tells her about the ham:

“You know your granddaughter made your famous ham for our first meal together as newlyweds.” The grandmother beamed. “I . . . just wondered about part of the recipe . . .”

The grandmother looked puzzled, “Which part?”

“Oh the part where you cut three inches off the ends and make it into a square. How does that make the ham so delicious?”

The grandmother laughed. “Honey, the hams are usually twelve inches long and I only had a nine inch pan AND it was square.”

Sometimes there is no reason for why something is done a certain way. You smoke because your mother smoked and you’ve just always done it. You bite your finger nails because . . . you started years ago and you “just do it.”. Those are behaviors—learned and seemingly fixed. Changing those behaviors takes a long-term approach. AND, long-term behavioral change begins with a resolution to change and the first step toward it. If you want to stop biting your nails, decide to DO IT; tell your friends you are doing it and need their help and support; then research the best ways to keep you from biting each time you start (hot sauce, polish, etc.) It really is that simple. If you bite them once or twice, don’t throw in the towel. Recognize you’ve gotten off your path and get back on it.

Fred Selfe’s Ninth Great Big Small Thing is to do something small each day to make yourself better. If you want to completely change a behavior, a 100% difference, do something small—only a tiny .3% each and every day—at the end of a year you will have completely changed and been able to take off a few days. It is called an incremental revolution—a complete life-changing revolution in very small increments.

Tens of millions of Americans are currently dieting; few of them are losing weight and keeping it off. Weight maintenance does not work that way. Real and sustained weight loss requires lifestyle change and that can only happen over a longer horizon. Our microwave oven mentality expects everything to happen now and in an instant the way a microwave oven heats food—FLASH! It’s done. That may work for frozen peas, but is dangerous when making real, long-lasting behavioral change.

Dramatic and sustained change is a process best approached in small steps toward the full goal.